Saturday, November 7, 2009

In awe.

And the experts say I'm delirious.
how do you melt right through the ice to the only trace of a beating heart that's holding on, how do you breathe life in me, how do you do that God? how...?

If I had something to feel, I'd feel imperfect.
Which I am.
Which I feel all the time.
But not in a bad way.
Not in the "I'm fat I'm fat shit I'm fat" way.
But in the "this is what it feels like to be human" way.
Darren and I were chatting on MSN.
And I told him that everyone has a major sin, and we have minor sins that we can get over easily but which others can't.
Sins are different for everyone.
Like mine.
I can't get over Lust but I can get over Envy quickly.
This is what it feels like.
And I'm just so tired of being imperfect.
I'll only be satisfied just to be like You, Lord.

What holds all the atoms of our body together?
Without a certain protein, we'd disintegrate.
Like gas particles in the air, random and without direction.
Meet Laminin.
"Laminin is vital to making sure overall body structures hold together."
And guess what.
It's molecular structure is the shape of the cross.
Romans 1:20 makes it clear that we can know God through what He has made. God certainly designed the laminin protein and gave it a structure that allows it to perform the function He designated for it. In fact, one of the early papers on the structure and function of laminin said this: “Globular and rodlike domains are arranged in an extended four-armed, cruciform shape that is well suited for mediating between distant sites on cells and other components of the extracellular matrix”.

I told you God holds the entire world.
And you said you didn't believe me.
Call me naive, call me silly.
Call me a fool for Christ.

I'm proud of it, I'm proud of Him.
I'm going to design my prom dress tomorrow.
1950s halterneck dresses never go out of style.
I saw this black halterneck dress with pirate skull prints.
It's so amazing but I can never get it, unless I spend 59+5 pounds (SGD$136++).


Therapy by All Time Low is an amazing song.
We might sing this for prom.
Don't watch out for Darren and I on prom night.
We're kinda shy. (teehee)
Darren is an awesome, awesome friend.
Just like his babe who is also my babe. (MEL MUST BE SHARED!!!)
Darren takes my shit, takes my weirdness and knows what funny is.
He knows music so freaking well and he's obsessed about rock concerts(which is cool 'cos he knows Yeah Yeah Yeahs are coming to Singapore next year and he's totally up for any rock concert - so if Paramore's coming to SG, he's gonna be the first one I hear excited squeals and "eggscelent"s from.)
Most importantly, He encourages me to keep track with God, like today.

Friends don't let us choke on our misery.
Neither do they present us with therapy.
They're just.. there to hold onto.
To hold onto.
To hold onto.

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